I got some feedback after my last post.
Positive, thoughtful, even reflective. My Last Reflection

However, this past week, I was talking to a friend of mine about some labor issues and before he got off the phone, he said he had one more question.

“Are you ending the blog?”
What? No, I replied, why?

He said with the title of the post, he wondered if it truly was my Last Reflection.
As in The End.
We both laughed and I explained, no, it was just the last reflection I had.
At that time.
I’ve had a few more since.

Which brings me to the point of this post. Isn’t it always easier to look back and think about what others should have done differently. Or even what we should have done.

Whenever I’ve reviewed difficult labor situations it typically always comes down to the point made in the last post. Don’t take it Personally.

I’ve discovered that my problems negotiating seemed to start when I would take a proposal; or a comment; or an aggressive strategy by the other side: Personally.

And while it may have been their intent that I take it so, the moment I actually did, take it personally, then I was at a disadvantage.

I used to be so concerned about how the other side would see me that I took on an entirely different persona.

Maybe I was channelling an inner being. I tried being the smartest guy in the room.

That only lasted so long.
Now I know better. Smartest Guy in the Room!

No one was impressed. And the negotiations were hard.
The other side didn’t know who they were dealing with. Me or fake JT. It took awhile until things got better.

It wasn’t until I got comfortable and stopped taking everything said by the other side as a critique on my ability.

But you may say, isn’t that simply a matter of maturity. Mine?
Getting more experience?

Perhaps, but I’ve seen seasoned veterans in other fields often fail or encounter great difficulties when negotiating because they simply ignore that one Golden Rule.

It’s as if they say, Wait a minute! I’m a …..( insert your profession here).
I( am a professional Lawyer or Teacher or Doctor or Elected Official – doesn’t matter.
No matter what you think your skill set may be. Or how much you may think of your abilities.
Once you take things said personally. Your clock. Gets cleaned. Everytime.

Let me repeat – Your skill set? It doesn’t matter.

Don’t be mad at me. It’s not personal.
Really. It’s not.

Reaching Resolutions Rule #1 Don’t Take it Personally!

ciao
JT

Jackson Browne
click this link