I negotiated a contract for an agency some years ago. I was anxious to let everyone know – the agency, my agency and especially my boss – that I was good. Real good.

So I go all out. I gave the union a set of proposals that would effectively take away items we gave them in the last contract. It’s all about winning, I thought.

Right?

Now in all honesty, giving proposals that are hard hitting is not uncommon. I do it all the time. The difference here was the why.

I wasn’t trying to use my hard proposals as leverage to back the other side off, to get them to withdraw their own proposals, No, I wanted the take away things. Things we had already gave them.

I envisioned my boss slapping me on the back, welcoming me into the good ol’ boys (& girls) club of great negotiators.

Here’s what I did. In the previous contract, we gave the employees an incentive. If they did not use any of the 12 sick days they earned in a calendar year, we would give them one day off to be used as a personal day in the next year.

So I proposed we would remove the extra day off. Why?

Well, as I explained to the union, the state was in a financial crisis. We needed to cut costs and here was one way we could do that.

The State of Illinois had approximately 40,000 employees who received this incentive benefit. The agency I was representing had all of 130 employees. This financial “savings” was not going to add up to anything substantive. Yet I insisted.

So what happened?
On the first day of negotiations, after I explained why I proposed rescinding this incentive day off – the union agreed! They signed off on it the very first day! So I accepted. I knew my boss would be pleased that I “took” something away. No other union in Illinois had this benefit taken away!

Not only that, I was so ecstatic for taking something away, I began to bully and intimidate the union’s negotiator. One minute I’d joke with him and the next I would get angry with him. I was putting on a show.

Turns out their guy was negotiating his first contract. He was nervous, somewhat unsure of himself and I took advantage. I tried to embarrass him. It was all about winning. And taking things away.

At least that’s what I thought.

Until I talked to my boss. Was he pleased?

He wasn’t. Why in the world would I do that? he asked. I fumbled for an answer but only came up with but I got something from them!

And I gave up nothing!

So he began to educate me in the world of labor relations – “Why would we want an agency of 130 employees to not have a benefit that 39,870 other employees already have? This administration (read: Governor) wants everyone to have the same benefits!

He said, “It’s not smart negotiating if I don’t negotiate with the big picture – the entire state in mind.” I needed to know the direction my principals wanted to go and fit my negotiations into the overall plan. And he said more sternly, ” We never try to embarrass the other side. After these negotiations, we still have to work together.”

So what I thought was a real coup – taking something away – really wasn’t. I didn’t stop to analyze what direction my superiors were going. And fit my negotiations into that direction.

I overreached trying to impress.
I ended up not impressing anyone.

I wanted to fight to get noticed.
I got noticed but not for the right reason.

I was trying to WIN and not trying to reach a resolution.
I had to learn I didn’t have to argue or fight to get ahead.

I had to go to War to learn…

We can be friends… and still accomplish our goals.

JT
Check the vid link below.