Well not quite the funeral, it was the visitation service the night before the actual funeral. A friend of mine had passed and it was, as expected, a somber scene.

As I was conversing with some people, this guy comes up to me and in a too loud of a voice for a visitation says “Hey John! What’s up?”

I didn’t recognize him at first, and then, I noticed his eyes. They were pretty intense and right then it clicked. I did know him. He ran against me for a local office 30 years ago. My first campaign. I don’t think I had seen him since.

He told me he was retired and tomorrow his wife was retiring and they were leaving to go on a trip to Hawaii. I congratulated him. He said, “Remember when we ran against each other?” And then, “Look, I even have more hair than you!”

Wow, that’s what he had to say after 30 years?

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not bothered by my hair or apparent lack of. Those that know me have witnessed my hair turning over the last decade from dark brown, almost black to silver (not gray, definitely not gray). When asked about the color, I blame my daughters. And I still have hair, it’s just short, real short.

I was surprised that after all that time, he’d lived his life, so did I, and there was nothing else he had to say. He remarked that after our race, he went into business and I didn’t. Was he one upping me?

I couldn’t help but feel that he needed to let me know he was doing all right. Better than all right. Was he still competing? Maybe it was just my imagination but it sure felt that way.
.
I don’t have any bad recollections or bad feelings towards him. I’ve lost campaigns too. Two if you’re keeping score. And then you move on.

Maybe he was holding on to an old grudge. Maybe he thought there was still something between him and me. Not to be cruel, but there is no him and me. I wanted to scream and say, “Dude, let it go!”

But I don’t ever say “Dude” and I was at a visitation, so I didn’t.

I do know when I’ve done that, holding on to something, I’ve ended up wasting time. My time.
So wrapped up in wallowing in the past, what went wrong, or trying to get even, I’m not able to do what I really want to do. You know, reach my resolution this year – Be happy.

Trying to change what can’t be changed.
It’s no good way to spend my day.
And it doesn’t make me any happier.

I told a friend about the conversation and he remembered the guy too.

In fact, in the office I worked at the time, everyone knew this guy and no one would tell me anything about him. “You’ll find out” was all they would say.

So, I just did what I thought I needed to do to let the voters know about me. I walked to just about every home in the district. My kids did too. So did Miechelle. And we won.

And, my friend told me, this guy took my yards signs too.
I had forgotten.

But in the spirit of fairness and full disclosure, I do remember my kids, Niki, Kris, Sara and Candice, calmly and very casually handing out our literature to voters at the door while simultaneously kicking his literature off the porch. Or hiding it under the door mat. They were really cute!

(NOTE to kids: No worry, the statute of limitations surely must have run out by now.)

I really don’t know if he did take the signs, but since I was reminded, if he did, I want them back.
And then, I can let it go.
JT